


the criminal-catching adventures of the rookie and the prosecutor

by astraeus (sirensq)



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/F, a law and order au? kinda?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-07
Updated: 2017-08-07
Packaged: 2018-12-12 05:17:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11730288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sirensq/pseuds/astraeus
Summary: Regina doesn't know how to deal with rookies, but she tries too hard once the new blonde spills coffee all over her shirt. Also, her friend Jones doesn't know how to keep his mouth shut, so he plays matchmaker instead.





	the criminal-catching adventures of the rookie and the prosecutor

**Author's Note:**

> hi, guys! i've posted another version of this chapter once before, but it was stilted and too rapid. i'd love a chance to do this again, years later, so the old version has been deleted and scrubbed until it was immaculate (hopefully). i can't guarantee scheduled posting with school returning soon, but i can try! enjoy. you can find me at charmills on tumblr.

Regina had had an odd day.

It had started out normally; she’d received a call from her step sister, Mary Margaret, to see if she’d like to visit for dinner. Dinners with her step sister and her sister’s husband, David, were the highlight of - well, whenever she got around to it. The invite was something she looked forward to, but it also meant the phone call dragged longer than she would usually allow.

When she got to the precinct that morning, her day went from joyful to lousy in almost record time. Her morning coffee run, interrupted by the long call with her sister, had never come to fruition. Regina without coffee was downright terrifying, and her detectives noticed right away what her grumpier-than-usual mood meant. So, they elected the rookie to take the fall.

“Give her the damn coffee, Swan!” a dark-haired detective nursing a broken wrist whispered as Regina walked into the chief’s office. “We’re gonna get terrorized if she doesn’t get her morning caffeine.”

Swan glared defiantly at her new partner, Detective Killian Jones. Looking for support, she glanced at the only other person she knew -- Detective Neal Cassidy, her old foster brother. She could see him raise a hand to cover a definitely-smiling mouth, shaking his head at her. “Fine!” she exclaimed, throwing her hands up in the air in exasperation. “I’ll get the damn coffee. You guys owe me if this lady chops my head off.”

Her walk turned into a slight jog when she heard the knob on the captain’s door turn. She grasped the paper cup and heard the click of heels echo behind her, though it didn’t completely cover the sound of Cassidy’s snickering.

“It seems you’re first in line for coffee this morning,” the voice husked. Emma jumped and turned, coffee cup cap forgotten. Hot brown liquid sloshed out of the cup and all over Regina’s bright white -- Emma winced -- dress shirt. Her gaze flickered from the rapidly spreading stain up to the ADA’s eyes. “I am so sorry, I didn’t -- “

Regina shook her head stiffly. “Get me some napkins,” she ordered, pulling the shirt away from her body so the scorching blotch wouldn’t burn her. Emma nodded frantically and snagged a few napkins from the table. Her eyes finally roved over the entirety of the brunette, who she had only met once prior, too quickly to even introduce herself. She wiped at the white shirt gingerly before Regina snatched her wrist. “Dab, do not wipe,” the brunette stated before taking the napkins from Emma.

Emma’s face colored. “Okay,” she agreed and stepped back to survey the damage. “Again, I’m really sorry.“

“It’s quite alright, dear. I know who sent you to get the coffee anyway. I can just blame him for everything, as I always do,” Regina smirked.

“But I was the one who spilled -- “

The ADA shut the rookie up with a roll of her eyes. “Nonsense, I scared you.”

Emma blanched. “You didn’t scare me!” she denied. “You just… were there?”

Regina laughed at the lie. “Okay,” she conceded, “Where is Jones?”

“Right here, m’lady!” the dashing detective piped up from behind them. “Always at your service!”

He grinned lasciviously, eyeing ADA Mills’ new see-through blouse. “Ay, it seems you have a little something.” He poked at her chest in jest.

She slapped the hand down and stared at him. Soon, they were laughing. Swan looked on confusedly as Cassidy seemed to register her perplexed state. “They’re the self labeled bi buddies,” he stage whispered. 

“They’re what?” 

Killian’s eyes sparkled with delight. “We bat for a few teams, if you catch my drift.”

“Like -- oh.”

“‘Oh’ is right,” Regina agreed. 

“But, uh, does that mean you two have ever … you know?”

Cassidy snorted. “They haven’t, but not for lack of trying on Killian’s part.”

“What can I say? Lady Mills is absolutely stunning.”

“Down, dog,” Regina ordered. “I should get going. I only came to pick up some paperwork from Captain Gold, but now it seems I also have to change my shirt.”

Emma blushed again. “I’m so sorry about that, the coffee was for you and -- “

“You’ve apologized numerous times already. I’ve already told you, it’s fine, Detective…?”

“Swan. My name is Emma Swan.”

“Well, Miss Swan, I will see you around. Cassidy, Davy Jones -- yes, Jones, we’re back to that, you smell that bad -- another day?”

“Goodbye, love! I’ll bring you your favorite coffee later!”

\--

Davy Jones, as Regina affectionately called him, hadn’t been lying.

She swung by her apartment to change shirts and throw her white one in the wash after leaving the station. She was halfway through buttoning up her cream colored shirt when her phone rang. “It’s your devilishly handsome delivery man! Open up!” she heard when she put the phone to her ear. 

She rolled her eyes and went to open the door, letting Killian view a creamy expanse of skin. He politely averted his eyes as he stepped into her home. “Here’s your order, your majesty. Just how you like it; filled with your favorite cream. Or, second-favorite, I suppose.”

The cup filled the tips of her fingers with warmth. She took a sip and moaned. She figured she’d ignore the obvious innuendo since Killian had actually gotten her favorite coffee. “If you came here to make sure I’m still in a good mood, you will find that I have been over the moon since your rookie dropped coffee all over me.”

“Ay, Swan put you in that good mood?” he replied with a playful cock of his eyebrow, fidgeting with his hands. 

Regina sighed as if this conversation pained her. “Are you trying to suggest something?”

“Nothing at all, queenie.”

She narrowed her eyes at the detective. “Stop beating around the bush and tell me what you’re trying to say.”

“What I’m trying to say, love, is that beating around the bush is exactly what you’d want to do with Detective Swan.”

“What?”

“She looks like she’d have a pretty sweet muffin for you to munch on with your coffee.”

“Killian Jones! Davy Jones!”

“Lick your fingers clean, though, make sure you get rid of all the crumbs.”

“I swear to -- “

Killian’s eyes gleamed with thinly veiled mischief. “I mean, you shouldn’t really go after her. Let her come to you. Come all over you, I’d say.”

“Oh, you’re dead, Davy.”

“What are you gonna do? Snatch my gun? I know you’d also like to snatch kisses from Swan, and maybe kiss the snatch.”

“You’re dismissed.”

“What, are you going to invite Swan over, have dinner, maybe eat out?”

The ADA huffed and shoved Killian back out the door. “As much as I appreciate the coffee,” she said, finishing the last button on her shirt, “I can do without your constant talking.” 

She slammed the door and the dark haired detective began rapping furiously against it. “You know you love me, Regina!” he said cockily.

He smiled to himself, and glanced down at his phone, illuminating as he received a text from Detective Swan. “hey did i get mills’ coffee order right?? double espresso?? just so i know for next time”

Jones chuckled -- the fun was about to begin.

\--

Despite all of Emma’s hopes, she did not see the dashing lawyer at the precinct the next day. Instead, she fielded inane questions from Jones throughout her entire work day.

For example: when she went downstairs to visit the ME for the latest on their most recent victim, Jones asked where her favorite place to eat was. When she returned to her desk after updating Captain Gold on how she was dealing with work, he asked if she found the dark, mysterious type attractive -- and when she couldn’t figure out the answer to that, he asked if she found men attractive at all.

For a while, she guessed he was talking about himself, but her detective skills were not for naught; those questions pointed just as well to ADA Mills, and she was more than okay with that.

She answered all of them, and perhaps she spent a little too much time glancing at the doorway, waiting for a brunette bob to walk in. She drank the double espresso sitting on her desk, much too strong for her tastes, but perfect for one assistant district attorney.


End file.
